Report: Nine Mile Road Construction May Have Been Completed Years Ago, But Crews Blame Barrels For Confusion

April 1, 2021

Information obtained by NorthEscambia.com today, Thursday, April 1, indicates that construction on Nine Mile Road may have actually been completed years ago, but construction workers became confused by all of those orange barrels.

“I know drivers can understand how confusing orange barrels can be everywhere, so we hope motorists will understand that the construction workers also got lost,” Steve Karrin, a construction foreman familiar with the situation, said. “As the barrels were shifted around, we may have paved the same area more than once. In some places, we took samples and realized that we have repaved the same spots near Pine Forest Road at least a dozen times.”

“The barrels are like Dollar Generals, they do just pop up at night wherever they can,” the foreman continued. “That is why you always see the construction guys just standing around looking like they are doing nothing. They are trying to figure out where they are.”

Reports show the situation was complicated by Hurricane Sally. Most of the barrels on Nine Mile Road were moved by the hurricane force winds. Crews worked to return the barrels to the proper location, but in many instances, put them in the wrong place, the report states.

The person who answered our call at F-DOT on Thursday confirmed that while Nine Mile Road is a state funded project, they would be unable to comment today due to the April Fool’s Day holiday.

Drivers have of course been long frustrated by the endless years of work on Nine Mile Road.

“I’ve been coming here for at least 10 years for the shrimp,” a customer at Gulf Coast Seafood at 2250 West Nine Mile Road said Thursday. “They actually have signs up telling you to make a U-turn in the Pine Forest Road intersection in order to get here. A U-turn in that intersection? You try that and barrels are everywhere when you turn back. I got in between some of them one time and just had to walk on over here. I just wanted some fish for Good Friday.”

Pictured: This area of Nine Mile Road at Pine Forest Road may have actually been paved multiple times. NorthEscambia.com photos, click to enlarge. Happy April Fool’s Day, 2021.


Comments

39 Responses to “Report: Nine Mile Road Construction May Have Been Completed Years Ago, But Crews Blame Barrels For Confusion”

  1. Barriers on April 11th, 2021 11:09 am

    Well, looks like construction will be prolonged again after this weekends weather could have possibly “moved the barriers” causing more confusion amongst the crews.

  2. Citizen on April 5th, 2021 9:02 am

    Best April Fools joke ever!!

    What makes it even better is that it wouldn’t surprise me to learn that it’s not far from the truth.

    Brilliant!!

  3. Stumpknocker on April 4th, 2021 7:11 pm

    @ worker , please tell all of that you are not the one reading the blue prints ? !!!!

  4. Stumpknocker on April 4th, 2021 7:04 pm

    Thanks for the great story , but the responses by all the Karen’s are the best,lol .

  5. William L on April 4th, 2021 4:59 pm

    Let me clarify, I understand that this is meant to be satirical, but I find nothing funny about this situation at all, our tax dollars are being either wasted or stolen!!! Which is it?

  6. Lou on April 3rd, 2021 7:40 pm

    Lol Best article in a long time. The Fldot gives us lemons, we’ll let’s make lemonade.

  7. MaryJane on April 3rd, 2021 7:31 pm

    Good one, William! Thank you so much for all of your articles: serious and humorous. You are so creative, talented and hard working. I appreciate you keeping us informed, especially the daily report on COVID. You are awesome! Happy Easter!

  8. Chris Curb on April 2nd, 2021 9:29 pm

    It’s an April fools joke and hilarious that people react before reading the story. I managed capital improvement projects and dealt with contractors for 25 years with Escambia County, and I am pretty sure the same roadway section would not get paved that many times; obvious joke! LOL

  9. Suzie B on April 2nd, 2021 1:45 pm

    I agree with CJ – it’s almost believable – unfortunately lol Thanks for the giggles

  10. Abby on April 2nd, 2021 1:36 pm

    How can people be so… I’m sorry. Let me start over. People: before commenting read the article you’re about to comment on. For some of you, read the article two or three times. Then read at least a few of the comments. You may save yourself some embarrassment….

  11. Mike J. on April 2nd, 2021 11:47 am

    Had me going for a minute but got a good laugh when I realized it was a joke.
    Cheers!

  12. CJ on April 2nd, 2021 10:19 am

    If it wasn’t for April 1st I would have believed every word of it. Still wonder if it’s not true!

  13. Tracy on April 2nd, 2021 8:58 am

    This article is hilarious!!! How do you repave the same road over & over & over without someone saying “are ya sure?” Plus we’ll add the fact that this construction has been going on for YEARS!!! Not just since Sally!!! Do the taxpayers get a refund for wasted time and materials since it is the wonderful Roads Inc that made the mistake? I mean if they hired me to do a job and I did it wrong would I still get paid?? Heck no!! I’d be reported as a sham business and sued. This is truly epic!!!

  14. Carol on April 2nd, 2021 8:50 am

    And what is the job of the foreman, again?

  15. Artemis on April 2nd, 2021 8:24 am

    Wicked funny!! Thanks for the laughs.

    I do believe some people took this article seriously. Please, read it again…

  16. Perry on April 2nd, 2021 7:38 am

    This is Pulitzer material! Thanks for the laugh!!!

  17. NWFLA LINDA on April 2nd, 2021 7:22 am

    What’s the saying “there’s a grain of truth in every joke”. You got every one of us who read the article and thought it was quite real because, well, we’ve driven those roads! Good one.

  18. Matchbox on April 2nd, 2021 12:00 am

    Lol ..love the article William… good one…love the comment even more …READ SLOWER…that was epic.

  19. William Reynolds on April 1st, 2021 11:00 pm

    “your resources are absolutely wrong, and this is more than the first time I’ve caught you in the act of lying. Get you info right before posting this stuff.”

    Begin your fact checking this way — You should read the story again, slowly and work harder to understand what’s really going on. It should be very obvious.

  20. Worker on April 1st, 2021 10:16 pm

    I’d honestly like to fact check this.. I run a paving crew on nine mile and I know for a fact, iv’e never paved the same place a dozen times. Your resources are absolutely wrong, and this is more than the first time I’ve caught you in the act of lying. Get you info right before posting this stuff.

  21. Wow on April 1st, 2021 7:31 pm

    Very funny stuff, proof people should always read the entire article before posting comments.

  22. Suzie B on April 1st, 2021 7:21 pm

    Right after Sally – we drove from Hwy 29 to Pine Forest on 9 mile and the barrels being gone sure looked great. Well, they were all in the grass on the side – lol Then they returned…

  23. phillip on April 1st, 2021 7:03 pm

    wonderful!!! great joke, absolutely hilarious!! well done NorthEscambia

  24. EVELYN L OWEN on April 1st, 2021 5:30 pm

    Ha Ha! Good one William! But seriously, the reason for ALL those barrels is the contracts now pays PER BARREL. It’s on top of the contract as a safety expense. That is one of the ways Roads makes their profit. The more barrels, the longer they are placed, the more profit. Barrels of profit!!

  25. Willis on April 1st, 2021 5:19 pm

    Funny how many people don’t understand this story and April 1st.

  26. LADave on April 1st, 2021 5:19 pm

    I call the construction crew, six men, a dump truck and a road grader! I’m convinced they only have six workers and just shift them to various areas to fool us in to believing their actually working?

  27. Bella on April 1st, 2021 4:25 pm

    Maybe paved over 12 times!!!?????
    In the words of Bugs Bunny:

    “What a maroon….”

  28. bob on April 1st, 2021 4:14 pm

    Happy April Fools Day!!!

  29. EMD on April 1st, 2021 3:25 pm

    LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

  30. wow on April 1st, 2021 2:51 pm

    if it wasn’t for this being April fools day this story could be completely believable. By watching the little work that EVER gets done and how few “workers” there actually are doing the job I could see how they could get overwhelmed by the barrel populations explosion. I wonder if roads inc ever got an actual map of what they were “supposed” to do.

  31. mq on April 1st, 2021 2:50 pm

    April’s Fool!!
    But it’s been so long, it could be true!!

  32. J.Larry Seale on April 1st, 2021 2:27 pm

    I am going to take a couple
    to remind me of the good old days

  33. Molino on April 1st, 2021 1:34 pm

    They need some barrel herding dogs to keep them barrels in their proper place.

  34. Reader on April 1st, 2021 1:23 pm

    April Fools! I hope. But may its true. Best satire ever NorthEscambia!

  35. Mike Beulah on April 1st, 2021 1:17 pm

    Does this mean we ( taxpayers) have to pay confused workers company and foreman who should have prints of the construction to assist confused workers in proper placement of cones for the continuous repaving of same road? Lol
    I can understand one repave mistake but at some point I’d have to think “ I’ve paved in front of this store at least a dozen times”.
    A PLAN via company foreman might be nice, have a morning meeting with workers to go over the days work that the foreman is keeping up with prints/plans/progress to let the workers know where and what.
    Use prints/plans to have a few guys check daily to ensure proper placement might be an idea … come on guys .. this is embarrassing to say the least.

    Btw: where do I apply for one of these foreman positions? :)

  36. My thoughts on April 1st, 2021 1:14 pm

    This sounds like an April Fool’s Day joke.

  37. Haha on April 1st, 2021 1:13 pm

    April Foolish

  38. bill l on April 1st, 2021 1:07 pm

    Great April fools joke, good one North Escambia

  39. Jackson Tate on April 1st, 2021 12:49 pm

    Blame it on the contractor. They take on too much work. The cities infratructure is way out of whack due to this. Theres other conpanies in pcola that can do this but roads inc always wins. Idk who they sleepin with





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